The Script For My Animation Assignment

This is mine, nobody steal it. I have witnesses.

(Title Sequence)

Random Voice: And now for another episode of

(Many voices): The scribbles!

(The scribbles written in large letters. Characters bounce in to make up some of the letters).

( Bob {green} and Jim {blue} next to each other)

Jim: Bob

Bob: Yeah

Jim: ... I’m pregnant... It’s yours.

Bob: What!? But, but-

Jim: (shaking, and laughing) Gotcha! Of course I’m not having a baby, bone head. I’m a guy. Do you even know how babies are made?

Bob: My mom told me there’s a nearly-all-powerful being who controls the entire universe, using it’s magical yellow wand (hach-bee??) to create life, and it’s (white brick of purity?) the destroy.

Jim: Nearly all powerful? (mockingly)

Bob: It doesn’t like sunlight

Jim: .......... That... is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. There’s no such thing as a nearly-all-powerful being. Come on, I’ve got a book for you to look at. It’ll explain some things.

(Camera moves up, zooming past birds to a cloud, with a table with pencils on it, and a man looking through binoculars, all under a shade cloth)

Creator:  No such thing huh. We’ll see about that.

(Walks to the table, picks up the pencil and draws baby scribble in the air. It floats there till finishes, then he catches it)

Creator: Aaawww, your soooo cuuute...

(baby noises)

Creator: Well, time to leave the nest little buddy.

(drop kicks it off the cloud, we see it falling to earth)

(Cuts to Jim and bob)

Jim: You ready?

Bob: Yeah. (Excitedly bouncing up and down).

Jim: (clears his throat)(opens a book). When a cheerleader and the football captain get very, very drunk-
(Said to the same rhythm people say, “when a mummy and a daddy love each other very much)

(Cuts to baby falling faster, in a teardrop shape)
(Cuts to Jim and Bob)

Jim: - Then, they walk out of hospital with a brand new baby-

(Cuts to baby falling faster, elongated teardrop)
(Cuts to Jim and Bob)

Jim: So now you know that babies don’t come from some mystical magic man.

Bob: (depressed) Yeah I guess...

Jim: (laughing) What would they do, just fall out of the sky...

(Baby lands on him, splashing Jim out, and landing safely.

Jim: ... Owww. (Understaded)

(Jim reforms, baby on his head)

Bob: Oh my god! It’s true. There is a creator. He gave us a baby from the sky. Take that book. (Throws it away).

Jim: Calm down Bob, it probably just got chucked out of an aeroplane. I’m gonna call the police. They can have him

(Squiggle extends into an arm with mobile on the end to where his ear should be)

(Ringing sounds)(Gargled telephone voice)

Jim: Hi, I’m calling to report a baby that we found.
(Gargled telephone voice)
Jim: It fell out of the sky and landed on me.
(Gargled telephone voice)
Jim: Aaah, my names Jim-
(Beep, beep, beep)
Jim: What was that about? She said something about prank calls then hung up on me.

Bob: Well that is weird. I don’t know what she was talking about. (looks away and whistles).

Jim: ... How many times did you call them being me?

Bob: By my count... 47 times.

Jim: (looks down and shakes his head)Oh god...

Bob: Hey, does that mean we can keep it till his parents come get him.

Jim: No way. We can’t look after a baby. I’m not qualified for the whole parental thing.

Bob: Come on Jim, he has nowhere else to go. Please.

(Cut between Jim and bob repeatedly like puss in boots cute eyes, zooming into bob each time)

Jim: ... Fine. (Slumps in defeat)

Bob: Oh come on cheer up. It’s goanna be great.

(Baby poops on Jim’s head. )

Jim: Sure it is. (Sarcastic).

(Fast music and a montage of baby related tasks, e.g. being woken up early, bottle feeding it and having it go right through, sneeking back to bed, then the baby crying again, putting a nappy on it, then having the baby liquidise out, the baby swallowing a torch, then having blinding light coming out of its eyes, etc.)

(Cuts to Jim and Bob panting).

Jim: How can one kid be so much work?

Bob: So.... much.... poop....

Jim: Hey, where’s the kid???

(Both characters freeze. Duh Duh DUUUUH music plays. Characters look to the right, camera moves right to a random scribble playing an instrument to the baby, making the sound. Scribble tlloks at the camera, then edges out of the frame, alternating between a fast pace and stopping. Jim and bob move over to the kid.)

I can’t believe we haven’t heard anything about a missing baby yet.

Bob: I’m telling you, the creator made it for us.

Jim: There’s no such thing as the creator.
(Chirping noise as bird poo falls on Jim).

Bob: See. God’s punishing you for not believing.

Jim: That happens to everybody. The creator doesn’t exist.

(Jim is struck by lightening).

Jim: That’s just bad luck. He’s not real. (getting louder and angry).

(Get’s hit by an anvil)

Jim: Oh come on!

Creator: (disembodied voice) Not very bright are you?

(Jim, baby and bob look up, and the camera zooms up to the creator on his cloud, who waves)

(Cuts to bird’s eye view of Jim, bob and baby).

Jim: And you are???

(Back to creator).

Creator: I am all knowing. I am all powerful. I am god. (Thunder behind him and sky darkens). Kneel before me puny mortals.

(Cut to bird’s eye view and Bob bowing repeatedly).

Jim: So you’re the one responsible for ruining our lives with this thing. (Points to baby, maybe baby looks behind itself, or gives a ‘who me’ look?)

Creator: Yes, I created the infant to punish your refusal to believe in my existence, blob. 

Bob:  (still bowing) oh lord, please forgive us, we are but unworthy men. Repent, repent.

Jim: What he means is, take the dam kid back!

Creator: Never! Mwa ha haaaa.

Jim: Never ever?

Creator: Never ever, ever.

Jim: Not even if I do this???

(Grabs a torch, shoves it into the baby, then points the beams of light at the creators cloud, lighting it up and making the creator scream/hiss like a vampire and fall/neil).

Creator: please spare me.

Jim: Only if you help us with our problem.  (arrow comes out of his body and points at the baby).

Creator: Yes, anything.

(Jim squeezes baby, torch pops out, light beams die)

(Creator stands and composes himself).

Creator: I won’t erase the child from existence, but I will send you some help.

(cuts to jim, baby and bob. Trampoline falls from the sky, narrowly missing Jim)

Bob: A trampoline? But how does that help-

(Pink squiggle falls from the sky, bounces off trampoline and lands on Jim.

Jim: ...Oww.

(Jim reforms, shakes himself, then looks at the pink lady blob, who’s holding the baby.[Mental note: give her more feminine curvs]. Sexy music starts playing)

Kate: Hi boys. I’m kate.

(Cuts to Jim and Bob. Slide whistle noise and Jim gets a little taller and thinner.)

Bob and Jim simultaneously: Uuuuh .... hi.

Kate: You both look exhausted. Come inside and I’ll make you dinner.

(She turns and walks off)

Bob: ... I like her jim.

Jim: Me too Bob. Me too.

Cuts to credits.

Final scene – Either:

a)      Jim and Kate mirroring the first scene, and she looks at him
Kate: Jim.
Jim: Yeah.
Kate: I’m-
(end scene)

b)      OR (creator looking through his binoculars at night and chuckles to himself, with the sound of bed springs in the backround)